Speed and Spyke by Morven
The 4 are going to their seats, Skye appearing to be happy, John keeps his head down and Peat looks angry, Pad looks pale.
Skye: Ya all right Pad?
Pad: Muhw.......
John: Right.
Peat: These guys must be from the Dr Evil cult. *Group look at him.* Seriously!
John: (Dr Evil voice) Mr Power's, I am going to drive you mad by making you watch cartoon! Mwahhh!!!!!
Skye: Nah, these guys are just sad.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
We open at a basketball game. The crowd is cheering wildly. A whistle blows.
Teammate: Daniels, over here!
Crowd: Ohhh.
Girl: Get him!
Crowd: steal the ball! Set up your zone. Don't let him shoot.
Storm: Is it always this exciting?
Evan's Dad: No. This one's a real nail-biter.
Pad: Ew?
John: Woho........
Peat: Through the dang ball!!!!
Coach: Come on, 10 seconds. Let's go. Pietro, Daniels is open. Now!
Evan gets the ball.
Storm: You can do it, Evan. Shoot, shoot!
Evan goes up, makes the shot and falls to the floor, where spikes poke out of his body. Storm appears to be the only one who sees. The team picks him up in celebration. Pietro stands there and looks angry.
Peat: Who's gay boy?
********************
Opening scene.
********************
In the boys locker room.
Teammates: Good game, man. Yeah, Daniels, you rule, man.
Evan: Thanks, guys. Good game.
Pietro: I should have known you'd hog all the glory.
Evan: What are you talkin', man? Everyone knows that--
Pietro: Everyone knows if it weren't for me, you wouldn't have had that last shot. I knew I should've just taken it myself.
Skye: That's Pietro, in the comics he's Magneto's son, but we don't know if that's going to be the part for him in this.
John: Yea, Pietro has a twin.
Evan: Hey, that was a great pass, man. But there's no way you could've made it down the court in time for a shot.
Pietro: Hey, dude, I got moves you can't even imagine. And I'm through holding back just to make guys like you look good.
Pad: I think he needs to eat more.
Skye: Some say its because of his power.
Peat: What power? To look gay?
John: No! Pietro is the speedster, hence why the title is called ‘Speed and Spyke'?
Peat: There are titles?
Skye: We should lock him up.
Pietro storms out and Storm walks in.
Storm: Seems like that boy has been competing with you ever since you were babies.
Evan: Hey, auntie O, what's up? Where's dad and mom?
Storm: Waiting outside. I think the boys' locker room makes your mother nervous.
Peat: Why?
Skye: Shut up.
Pad: Just because Logan ain't gonna be here!
John: Pad, he's not going to be in the next ep! He's in this one.
Skye: I just wish he was in at the swimming pool ending! *Pretends to sob*.
Evan: Right. Some game, huh? It's tight that you showed.
Storm: And miss my favourite nephew's big game? Heh. Not a chance.
Evan: Thanks again for coming, auntie.
Storm: Evan, are you all right? I've been concerned about you lately. You know, about the things we've discussed before.
Evan: Yeah, yeah, no problem, auntie O. everything's cool.
Storm: Evan, I saw what happened to you out there tonight when you fell.
Evan: Hey, it's no big deal. I got it under control. Ah... ah-choo! *spikes fly everywhere*
Pad: AH! Now I get the title, I wouldn't want to met him in a dark alley.
John: Very few want to.
Skye: Aye, he's the most hated one in the line up.
Storm: Bless you.
Evan: [sniffs] Busted, huh?
Storm: Big time.
********************
Shift to Evan's house.
Evan's Dad: Still can't get over that last shot, son. What a beauty. You're gonna remember this game for a long time.
Evan's Mother: Yes. Wasn't it exciting?
Peat: OH! I want my......... Babybackbabybackbabyback, ribs! I want my..... Babybackbabybackbabyback, ribs!
Skye: Shut, up.
Storm and Evan are off on their own near the edge of the yard.
Storm: What amazes me is that you've kept it concealed this long.
Evan: I'm telling you, I've got it covered. A few points, a few spikes. I mean, so what? This is New York.
Storm: Evan, you need to take this seriously. The Xavier Institute can offer you training.
Evan: I don't need training, man. I can take care of myself. Anyone messes with me--bam!
Pad: Oh, the poor tree.
Skye: Since when did you care about a tree?
Pad: Since I found out trees take in carbon dioxide and bring out oxygen.
John: When did you learn this?
Pad: Someone talked about it in a chat room.
Skye: See? You do learn something knew everyday!
Storm: No, Evan. You mustn't use your powers like that. You have to learn control.
Evan: Hey, I've got control, see? Everything's cool.
Storm: Like in the locker room?
Evan: All right, so it's not perfected yet.
Storm: I think we'd better continue this conversation with your parents.
Evan: Like I didn't know that was coming. Look, can't this wait till after school tomorrow? I mean, this is a big night for them.
Evan's Dad: *calling* Get 'em while they're hot!
Peat: (Mimicking Evan's Dad) Because I know how much you like a burnt tounge!
Storm: All right.
Professor X: *speaking telepathically* Ororo, how's it going with your nephew?
Storm: *speaking telepathically* Just as I feared, professor. He's being stubborn.
John: I wonder where he gets that from?
Skye: Yup, not from his mommy.
Pad: Mommy?
Skye: American talk honey.
Professor X: *speaking telepathically* All right. We'll go to plan B. Scott and Jean will arrive in the morning. By the way, Cerebro detected another mutant signature at the game tonight, but couldn't get a clear reading on it for some reason. Did you notice anyone else there unusual?
Storm: *speaking telepathically* Maybe, but I'm not certain yet.
Professor X: *speaking telepathically* Very well. Keep me informed.
Peat: Huh?
John: She mean Pietro.
Peat: Oh.......
********************
Next day in school. Evan opens his locker to find his wallet empty.
Evan: Aw, man, not again!
Pietro: Something wrong?
Evan: [gasps] Where did you come from?
Pietro: That's a question you should be asking on the basketball court.
Pad: Damn, even if he is gay, he's funny as f...
Skye: Feck! Funny as feck! Woohoo!
Evan: Hey, look, I know you're fast, man. You were really busting some great moves last night.
Pietro: Aha! You finally admit that I'm better than you.
Evan: I said you were faster, not better. I still got a few tricks of my own, you know.
Pietro: Sure, you do, like getting ripped off for the second time this month. What's up with that?
Evan: Yeah, and I even changed the combination.
Pietro: Hmm, sounds like a bona fide mystery, dude.
Evan: Yeah, but I'm gonna trap this sleazeball.
Pietro: Sure, Daniels, but you're gonna need some bait.
Evan: Hey, thanks, man. I'll get it back to you on allowance day. Catch ya later.
Pietro: Not even on your best day, Daniels. You'll never catch me.
Peat: Oi!
John: Don't get all upset.
Peat: That little.......
Skye: They really want Peaty here to crack, then make the rest of us go mental. Like that hasn't happened already!
John: Yea, they had to make Peat miss the match.
********************
Shift to the Daniels' living room.
Evan: Man, you don't give up, do you, auntie O?
Jean: That's because she loves you. She's concerned. We all are.
Evan's Mom: This certainly explains why you're always coming home with holes in your clothes.
Pad: Hum, and all the places where the spikes could come out........
Peat and John put a hand over their, ehm, parts.
Skye: Pad, your making the guys nervous.
Storm: We always knew this was a possibility, Vi. While you did not receive the mutant gene as I did, we knew it could show up in future generations.
Scott: It's really not so bad, Mrs. Daniels. Having special powers can be pretty cool sometimes.
John: I'm pretty sure Ororo is an orphan.
Skye: This just gives something for Ororo to do, you know? Otherwise she'll be in the background.
Evan: Oh, yeah? I'll tell you what, shades. Let me see what you've got that's so cool.
Evan's Mom: Evan.
Evan: Sorry, mom.
Jean: No, really, it's ok. It's just... Scott's powers aren't really what you'd call... indoor-friendly.
Evan: Ok, whatever. Look, man, I like it right here, and I'm not going to some home for freaks. Now, if you'll excuse me, I got school stuff to take care of.
He leaves.
Jean: Well, that went well.
Scott: Yeah, and I thought we were really making a connection there.
Evan's Dad: I apologise for my son, Mr. summers. He's obviously dealing with a lot right now. I'll talk with him.
Jean: Ahh...hey, he's going out the window.
They run outside just in time to see him take off on a skateboard.
Scott: We really need to work on our sales pitch.
Pad: They aren't really working on there PR problem, are they?
Skye: Nope, first Kitty, then Freddy, then Rogue, now Evan. Huh, and the X-Men are the good guys......... Sounds easier to join the Brotherhood.
Peat: Yea, I could get Blob to sit on those two.........
Skye: Oh. Gr!
********************
Shift to the darkened school hallway.
Evan: Ok, sneak thief. You wanna play tonight? The spike man is ready.
A whirlwind flies down the hallway.
Evan: Huh? What the heck? Aah! Freaky, man. What's going on? Whatever it is, it stops now.
He throws out spikes, stopping the whirlwind.
Evan: Pietro?
Pietro: Call me Quicksilver. Like the outfit? Made it myself. Took about a quarter second. Well, would you look at this? Seems my old pal has a few tricks of his own. But as usual... not as good as mine.
Peat: Oh dear god. He looks really gay!
John: That's not nice, Pietro just has some problems with life.
Skye: Yes, you see the reason why he hates Evan so much is because he's got a full family, he hasn't, Evan's mum used to give Pietro counselling, but it stopped after she met Ororo.
Pad: Really?
Skye: No!
Evan: You? You've got powers, too?
Pietro: Duh. Finally. Remember, Daniels, anything you can do, I can do better. Mind if I take that back?
John: I hope he breaks into song.
Peat: Yea.......... Why?
Skye: For the sake of it. These are the people who air Pokemon, and we all know about the songs in that!
Evan: But why would you wanna rip me off?
Pietro: Kicks, man. For the challenge. Look, when you live as fast as I do, there ain't enough things to occupy my time. I gotta entertain myself. And you thought you could stop me. well--uhhh *slaps him* wrong again.
Pad: That's not nice.
Skye: Maybe he gay. Should have punched him!
Evan: Don't bet on it.
Pietro: Gaah! Too slow. What a surprise. [yawns] you know, I think you're gonna need some more time to work on those powers of yours. Maybe I can arrange it.
Evan: What do you mean?
Pietro: Can you say scapegoat?
The cops enter, seeing only Evan standing there.
John: Well come to the Twilight Zone.
Group does the theme tune, then they start to sing Wham's ‘Wake me up'
Group: Wake me up before you go go, cause I'm not planning on going solo........
Skye: Hang on! *Group looks at her.* Circus tune!
Group does the circus tune.
********************
Scene opens in a jail.
Evan's Mom: Evan! What happened?
Scott: Welcome to the downside, pal. Misuse your powers, go to jail.
Peat: Is he trying to tell a joke?
Pad: Maybe.
John: Scott doesn't know the meaning of the word ‘joke'.
Evan: It wasn't me, man.
Jean: Hey, I believe you, Evan. In fact, I know you didn't do it.
Pad: Oi! That's an invasion of privacy!
Peat: Ohhh....... Hotty hot hot.......... *Falls off seat.*
Storm: Evan, please listen to me. Let us help you.
Scott: So we'll make you a deal. The professor will use his influence to get you out of here, and you give the institute a shot. What do you say?
Peat: Oi! They shouldn't be F-ing doing this!
Skye; Got to admit, he's right. They want to be accepted, but doing this is wrong.
Evan: Like I've got a choice?
Scott: Hey, hey. You've always got a choice. We just want to help you make it the right one.
Evan: [sighs] Ok. Deal.
John: Very shady.
********************
Shift to the Institute. Breakfast scene.
Kitty: So, like, where's this new guy?
Professor X: Still sleeping. He had a rather difficult evening.
Kurt: *porting in* [sniffs] ah. I love the smell of bacon in the morning.
Skye: I'm more of a potato scone person me self.
John: Myself.
Skye: No, me self.
John: I give up.....
Scott: I think he knows who really trashed those lockers. Did he tell you?
Professor X: No, and I'm not going to pry. He'll tell us when he's ready.
Logan: Mmm. You ask me, he's looking to settle that score personally. Pass the sausages, red.
Skye: Yea...........
Jean floats the sausages over to Logan.
Kitty: Eww! That stuff, like, totally plugs your arteries, you know.
Logan: I appreciate your concern.
Pad: He shouldn't have done that! He'll die young!
John and Skye laugh.
Peat: What?
Skye: Logan is about............ Say 100 years old. If he knew it.
Pad: How do you know that?
Skye: Comics.
Peat: There's a surprise.
Professor X: I suspect you may be right about Evans intentions, Logan.
Logan: Yeah, trust me, Chuck. I may not be able to read minds, but I know what a boy's thinking about when he's been wronged. *sees Kurt hanging from the chandelier* elf! [sighs] how many times I gotta tell ya? Ask, and it'll get passed to ya.
Kurt: Sorry. I didn't want to interrupt you.
Logan: That's better. Now mind your manners.
Peat: Oh ho Skye, if he was real he'd use the whip on you!
John: Shut up. Wee people could be watching!
Professor X: In any case, it might be best if Evan had other things to distract his mind. I've already enrolled him at Bayvile. Now, Scott, could you introduce him to the basketball coach?
Scott: Sure. After that last game he played in New York, Coach'll jump at him.
Professor X: Good. And let's hope that Evan's desire for vengeance is short-lived.
Evan is outside the room listening. He pops the spikes and walks away.
Pad: That's nice.
********************
Shift to the Principal's office.
Darkholme: I'm honoured that you've come.
Magneto: I'm not here for your little student body meeting, Mystique. Behold. *he displays a hologram*
Peat: A very expensive crystal!
Pad: A very old piece of china!
John: An old disk-man!
Group stars at him.
John: Nothing....
Darkholme: Ah, so this is the speed demon I've been hearing about.
Magneto: Pietro Maximoff. He is of particular interest to me. I have waited for just the right moment to approach this young man, and now is the time.
Darkholme: Then we shall extend the hand of friendship to the boy.
Peat: A very blue hand.
Skye: A very shape-shifting hand.
Magneto: It will not be that easy. He believes he needs no one, however, there may be a way.
Darkholme: Yes?
Magneto: Young Pietro has long had a grudge rivalry against Evan Daniels.
Darkholme: The new student Xavier enrolled here last week.
John: Don't get too excited!
Skye: Yes Mystique, we all know the damage it can do to your charming personality!
Magneto: Yes. Pietro has recently taken the advantage in that competition, and I believe Mr. Daniels would like to... settle the score.
Darkholme: Well, then, I know just how to bring them together.
Magneto: Excellent. Then I will take it from there.
John: Will this be something like Scream I wonder?
Skye: Hope not. Scream sucked, every single on! The only reason I watch the other's was because I like the guy who knew all about the scary movies.
********************
Danger Room.
Scott: This is your fifth run, Spyke. You want to take a break?
Evan: No time for breaks, man. You got me here to train, so let's train.
Logan: You heard the man. Let's roll.
Pad: Skye, stop drooling!
Skye: Damn it! Men shouldn't be wearing lycra!
Peat: Yea, like women shouldn't wear uniform.
Group look at him.
Peat: Its true!
Goes off on the course, not doing too bad when all of a sudden he loses it and lands on the floor.
Logan: Not too shabby, porcupine.
Kitty: Spyke! The coach just called. Says you gotta come to the gym. You've got a game tonight.
Evan: There wasn't one on the schedule.
Kitty: Well, there is now. Coach says Principal Darkholme, like, put it together last minute. Says he wants you suited up in, like, one hour. Cause you're starting against P.S. 104.
Peat: How many ‘like's can this gal do?
Skye: that's what you get with a Senga. (AN. Senga = Valley girl)
Kurt: Dude! All right! You get to play against your alma mater!
Evan: Yeah.
********************
Outside the school at the visiting team's bus.
Evan: Hey, Maximoff!
Pietro: Well, well. Out of jail already, or is this miserable dump part of your punishment?
Evan: We've got a score to settle, Pietro.
Pietro: As usual, too slow.
Evan: Whoa!
Pietro: Props for the attitude. Might be help for you after all, Daniels.
John: I don't get......
Skye: Pietro has a big ego, and you can't deflate it.
Scott: What's going on here?
Evan: Nothing I can't handle.
Jean: Is this the guy who was stealing from the lockers?
Evan: Stay out of this.
Scott: That true?
Pietro: Actually, yeah. Yeah. I trashed those lockers. Why? Ya gonna do something about it?
Scott: Look, I think you'd better come with us. Aah! *Pietro knocks him to the ground*
Pad: Woohoo! You show him Pietr.....
Skye: His name is Pietro! And he's the bad guy.
Pad: Come on! He knocked Scott down!!
John: You have to give the man props for that.
Pietro: I don't think so.
Evan: That's it, Pietro. You're goin' down this time!
Pietro: Ooh! Sounds like a challenge. Come on, Daniels. Let's see what you got. *gone in a puff of smoke*
Evan: Trust me, man. You're gonna find out!
Scott: Man, that guy's fast.
Jean: Well, we can't let Evan do this alone.
Scott: When you're with the x-men, you're never alone. Let's go!
Peat: Oh-my-god.
Skye: I second that.
Peat: Oh-my-god.
John: He hit his head at some point.
Pietro: Give it up, Daniels. You're out of your league.
Evan: Not this time, Pietro. It's time I win one!
Pietro: You call this a challenge? You can't even touch me, no matter what I do. Check it out, Spyke boy. Say bye-bye to Bayville.
Jean: We have to stop him.
Evan: I've tried. He's just too fast. I thought you said all that training stuff would help.
Scott: Training's just one part of it, Spyke. Teamwork's another.
Pad: He is so sad.
Scott: Jean! He can't run if his feet are off the ground.
Jean: On it.
Peat: Hotty hotty hothot. She's fine!
Skye: (Whispers to John) I'm glad this isn't a Fox X-Men, other wise all heaven would have gone on fire.
Pietro: [laughing] Ugh! Hey, what's goin' on? Aah!
Jean: I can't hold him.
Pietro: [laughs] Hold on to this, baby. It's twister time!
All: Aah!
Cyclops: Look out! Spyke! Lock and load!
Peat: He stole that from Autsin Powers!
Skye: Get over it!
Peat: You stole that from.....
John: Stop it!!
Group go into the cartoon affect fighting.
Scott hits him with his blast. Spyke nails him with spikes.
Pietro: I can't get loose! I can't get loose!
Peat: He's so gay!
Skye: Peat!! Roar.
Peat: Huh?
Skye hits him.
Evan: Not so fast now, are you, Quicksilver?
Pietro: Yeah, what good's it do you, Daniels? You still can't prove I had anything to do with gettin' ya in trouble, can ya?
Evan: Ooh, sounds like a challenge. I got it all right here. Check this out.
Pietro on tape: Actually, yeah. Yeah. I trashed those lockers. Why? Ya gonna do something about it?
Scott: Good shot, dude. Looks like some of that training did pay off.
[Police siren]
********************
In another jail cell.
Pietro: Hey. Hey! Hey, let me go! Hey! Hey! You gotta let me outta here! I want outta here! Unh! Wha--you?
Magneto: It is good to see you again, Pietro, even under such distressing circumstances.
Pad: Aw! Family love!
Pietro: Yeah, well, you can make them a lot less distressing, you know. Come on, hustle it up! Move it!
Magneto: Still impatient... but you have grown much, Pietro, and I have need of your services if you think you can handle the job.
Pietro: Ooh. Sounds like a challenge. Ok, whatever you want. Just let's bail this jail.
Peat: Is he that sad?
John: Just because he made it rhyme?
Skye: Do you think that's Magneto's plot? To make everyone say thing s in rhyme until they all go crazy and end up killing each other because they are fed up with saying things that rhyme all the time?
Group just stare at her.
Magneto: Very well. Come with me.
********************
Pool out back of the mansion.
Kurt: Look out! Cannonball! Aah!
All: Hey!
Kitty: Ok, knock it off!
Professor X: Congratulations, evan. I understand you've been cleared of all charges.
Evan: Yeah. It feels good to have that off my record. Hey, thanks for your help, professor.
Skye: See? No Logan!!
John: Save the tears for later.
Kitty: Eww! Professor! Kurt's, like, totally getting fur in the pool!
Kurt: I am not!
Professor X: we're just glad to have you with us.
Evan: Thanks. Hey, check this out! Whoo-hoo! Oh-oh! *pops Kitty's floater raft* sorry.
Professor X: [chuckles] It would appear your nephew's going to fit in just fine, Ororo.
Storm: Yes, but one must wonder, is that a good thing? [laughs]
Peat: Why can't we hunt these little...........
Skye: Peat, watch it.
The group leave, two shadows watch them.
Waugh: We've broken Peat! The plan is in motion.
Sharp: Yes, but...... Peat's just upset because we made him miss the match.
Waugh: Men. Football is your life. Pathetic!
Sharp: Come on, time to get you a lovely banana.
Go on to Middleverse.
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